a simple photograph.

as many of you know i overdosed...here's the note i wrote myself while recovering..

as many of you know;i'm not the most normal of people.i do shit i shouldn't;especially when i know i shouldn't.but DRUGS was always a slight undertone in some shit i did.... been sober for about a year now.. ;can honestly say life has been alot BETTER.i look back now and can't imagine wdf was on my mind.but anywho;past few days;i've been SICK.on some off the wall shit;bad headaches.runny nose.bodyaches.you know;flu type shit.so i took some tylenol and benedryll last night.really didn't do anything for me;so i took some more abouta hour later....and some more after that.but soon i had this real queezy feeling in my stomach;so i hit the sack.woke up this morning.still felt like shit.. . but i dealt.got to school;start throwin' up bricks and i couldn't stay awake.so my dad came and got me.took me to the hospital.they asked the usual.. ."last thing you ate;drank blah blah."i said;"i had a bottle of meds the last two nights."my dad looked wild and shit.i hadn't quite realized what i said until later.so the nurse did some tests and said she'd be right back.when she came back and told me what happened was when shit fell down.she said;"it looks as if you o.d;the combination of tylenol and benedryll isn't good for the body;which is what caused to throw everything in your system up in an attempt to get it out of your body;which caused the sleepiness and empty feeling in the stomach."and all the while;i'm thinking "damn;df was i thinking really?"so my dad asked me wdf was my problem.i'd usually laugh but i sat there... not saying anything.mostly because of the fact i didn't know what to say.so they cleared my system and said i'll be "good as brand new in a few hours..days..maybe a week.etc."

but mentally..right now.i'm fucked up... .to think if i woulda took one more sip.. or popped that one more pill.possible you woulda been seeing a shirt with this on it;Charles Darnell Bouler.7-23-93 - 11-13-08.thass some off the wall shit...so i'm attempting to use this as a chance to change my life once more.we'll see where this takes me.. ..and on the commments;i'm not looking for ADVICE.just remember that when typing.

p.s-so i guess i'mma druggie now.

but i simple photograph...sums all it up for me.

Thank God I Can Say;

Bee Outtie.

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